About a month ago I started my orientation working as an acute nurse again. The first week was spent on learning the basic corporate policies; nothing different from the previous work places I have been. But like anybody who is starting a job, anxiety sets in easily as I commenced my training the following week at the unit/floor I am assigned to. I guess it’s the combination of not knowing the computer program my new work place has (as its different from the ones I used in the past) and the challenge of knowing new people are the things that were making me anxious. Fair justifications I suppose. As days of orientation proceed, I started to get the hang of it and become more comfortable.
Among the many aspects of nursing, the time I spent with computer documenting is my least favorite. Although I can understand that this part is as essential, I feel that documentations take away the most important part of patient care- being with the patient and helping them heal. But then you learn to juggle in between these. And this part sometimes is the one that gives me second thoughts of leaving my chosen career. But as I have these thoughts of quitting, good things happen.
On my third week of orientation, I was given an assignment with a challenging patient. I will call her RM214 as this was her room number. RM214 has severe wound on her genitalia extending to her peri-anal area. She is heavily loaded of high dose pain medications and is non-compliant with wound care. Some nurses already expressed frustrations of having her in their assignments. With such preconceived thoughts, my initial reaction was that I just have to make it through my three-day weekend shifts and I will be all set.
So, I met her during hand off and exchanged the usual pleasantries. I can’t imagine how she acquired such significant injury at such a young age; her medical history tells me, but I still can’t fathom how. She seemed depressed and withdrawn. She expressed that she had given up and didn’t care about what I would do with her wound anymore while crying. She wanted to leave and go against medical advise. Without being judgmental, I could say she is a mess, but at the same time she seems lost.
I pride myself being a nurse. I know that one of the many traits I have is I always try to know my patients beyond just their names. I reach out and talk to them. This is what I did with RM214. During our initial conversation I learned that she has a husband and three young kids. I also found out that she likes being asked and be actively involved in things. These were my hints. I held her accountable and not just a passive participant of her care. I gave her choices. By the end of my 12-hour shift (and the entire three days), RM214 and I developed a good rapport. She let me removed her wound dressing and have her participate in doing it. I let her wear gloves and hold some wound supplies. We chatted about life while I changed the dressing. In such little way, I let her be in control of her life. I gave her some authority which I think may have been temporarily lost that caused her to be depressed and withdrawn. She thanked and hugged me when I discharged her on the third day.
The day after that long weekend at work I went to the beach to wash away my stress and regain some strength. I played with the waves and enjoyed them on my feet- some of them were strong, some were gentle. The tides and undertows reminded me of what a weekend I just had. Nursing can be rewarding and rough sometimes that you feel like just giving up. But when you think you are not being significant, unexpected things like what I just experience take place. In the end, it is hard to leave such a noble profession when you know you touch lives and make some difference- big or small.